I am writing this
as a celebration and proclamation of what God has done in my family's life over
the last six months. During an early morning quiet time last June, the Holy
Spirit clearly laid four words on my heart. In all honesty, I’m normally quite skeptical of
"words from the Lord" for fear of acting on something that is not
from Him. But this time the “words” were unquestionably clear and they fit perfectly with
where I was in the study of the Word. That morning I wrote in my journal these words: wisdom,
discernment, favor, and patience. Frankly, I had no idea what God was saying to me; but I
shared the words with my wife and we began to pray about each one. We prayed for wisdom, that God
would give us clarity of mind and the ability to see the plan He had in store
for us. We
prayed for discernment, specifically that God would give direction as things
became clearer. We prayed for favor, but this was a tricky one for me
personally. I was (and still am) leery of “favor” when it refers to an unbiblical bartering system with God.
It eventually became clear that the Holy Spirit was leading in a very different
direction.
Finally, we prayed for patience – the easiest to immediately understand, but by far the most
difficult to put into practice.
After all, I was in a hurry to find out what God was going to do.
Six months later,
our situation has become so much clearer. First, I have with great sadness stepped down as student
pastor at Heartland Community Church.
Rachel and I loved our time there, learned so much, and will miss the
students, leaders, and parents incredibly! And second, after much prayer,
fasting, and guidance from wise counsel, I have accepted a position with
Mission of Hope as Church Advancement Coordinator – and will be moving to Fort
Myers, Florida. Rachel and I truly
believe this is God's call on our lives, even though it will involve the
difficult process of uprooting our little family from OKC. What the job will entail and
the opportunities it will provide is an absolute fit with what the Lord has
laid on my heart. We are excited about what God is going to do in our lives
personally; but more importantly about how He can be glorified as we join the
MOH team and work to advance the Gospel in the country of Haiti. In no way do I feel that my
journey with God and his leading of my family and me is over. We trust that this is only the
beginning. Even so, with the
benefit of hindsight I can now see what the "four words" have meant.
Wisdom: In the
beginning it was tough. I was praying for wisdom in a vague sort of way without
a clear understanding of what that meant. Over the last six months it has become very clear that God
has granted me wisdom in two specific ways. First, wisdom has come in the form
of a more intense love for the Word. The way I study my Bible has become so
much more personal and applicable for all that I walk through on a daily basis.
I have a new appreciation for the Gospel thread throughout the entirety of
scripture and how it affects my life. Second, I learned in a new way about the
wisdom that our Lord provides through godly friends and confidants. There have been two men in
particular (you know who you are) who have come alongside me; and I could not
have gotten through the last six months without their friendship and wise
counsel. I am so thankful for that, for though our relationships will
undoubtedly change as I make this physical move, I now see the importance of
surrounding myself with godly men and “doing life” with them!
Discernment: I
have always felt that discernment was one of my spiritual gifts. But with a
decision of this magnitude -- one that would affect my family and so many loved
ones in such a significant way -- doubts sometimes creep in. Thankfully – as we prayed individually and
together – God
gave Rach and me clarity to know His will, and what our next step should be. But discernment’s value is only determined by
the obedience that accompanies it, and our gracious Lord has also given us the
strength to follow through on that clarity.
Favor: This was by far the most
difficult idea for me to get my head around. It's possible that my view of
"favor" has been skewed by too much late night Christian TV. For many Christians the word
seems to imply that "if I give to the Lord, He will in turn provide me
with a Mercedes Benz." Intellectually and biblically I know this not to be the
true meaning of favor, but it was a mental obstacle I had to overcome. Only in the last few weeks
have Rachel and I truly begun to understand what we had been praying for those
six long months. As
we began to sit down with those closest to us, and to share with them what God
was doing and where that would physically lead us, I realized that we had been
praying for favor in their hearts. God is so amazing that He would lead us to begin praying
for situations He knew were coming, that we were completely unaware of. Of course, there have been
many tears and more will come, but God has obviously been working and preparing
the hearts of our loved ones. Without exception, they have been able to see our
diligence in being obedient to our calling, and have been supportive of that
endeavor.
Patience: In his letter to the Romans
(Romans 2:7-8), Paul shows us how patience is tied to God centeredness. Of
course, that means that my impatience is tied to my self-centeredness. And because of my depravity,
if things would happen on my timetable, I would be unable to avoid taking more
credit than I deserve. Having patience, and the ability to wait on the Lord,
glorifies Him and keeps Him at the center in all that we do. At the start,
"patience" was the word I thought I understood the best. But as God
opened my eyes to see all that comes with patience, it has become so clear that
I had no clue what my lack of patience was really saying. I was actually telling God,
"I want to follow your will, but I will set the schedule and tell you how
it will go down." God has humbled me, and this word is the one more than the
others that I will continue to seek.
Instead of impatience, I want to progressively love and trust Him more,
and by His grace to put away the ungodly grousing that comes so naturally.
And so God has
used the last six months to equip me physically, spiritually, and emotionally.
I can think of no better way to close than with the words of the great hymn,
Great is Thy Faithfulness.
Great
is Thy faithfulness!
Great
is Thy faithfulness!
Morning
by morning new mercies I see.
All
I have needed Thy hand hath provided;
Great
is Thy faithfulness, Lord, Unto me!
